Noticing and Noting

They say news should be tailored to the consumer. To a certain extent, that has been going on for a while. People are reading about the Kardashians while I have to look up how to spell their name. Confession time: I'm not really sure how many sisters are in that family. From the supermarket tabloids I see at the checkout, I can guess there are at least two. For a while I thought perhaps they were mother/daughter, like Naomi and Wynonna Judd. Now I don't know why the Kardashians are famous. I'd be more impressed if they did/made/invented/wrote something. Perhaps if they teamed up with their brothers Sleepy, Sneezy, Happy, Grumpy, Doc and Dopey. Other than that...
A while back I touched base on people who were geniuses not being recognized as truly talented. The math whiz who worked at Subway, or the guy who bags groceries at my store and tutors calculus in his spare time.
Are they a taco short of a combo platter? Maybe.
Fame is not only fleeting, there are different definitions of success.
There was a bar here in town by the name of Taco land. Graffiti covered walls, a dark stage and the filthiest bathrooms. It was a dive in the truest sense of the word, but it was considered the pinnacle of the underground music scene. Playing Taco land was a benchmark for a struggling band. The owner, Ram Ayala, was killed years ago along with the doorman in a robbery. The place was boarded up, the music moved elsewhere. People I talk to recall the place with fondness. It was said that it wouldn't be Taco land without Ram, but time marches on. New owners have cleaned it up and made it more family friendly.
Last year I got an autograph from someone I consider famous. He's well know in the nerd set, but you wouldn't know his name or his artwork. Upon getting it, I showed it to all my nerdy friends and they all gave heartfelt congratulations. If I walked down the street and did the same thing to a complete stranger, the result would be different.
Two days ago, an artist that I considered very talented passed away. He barely made the obituaries in his hometown paper.
From what I read in the articles about David Trampier, he left a budding illustration career to become a cabbie in Carbondale, Illinois. Seriously, WTF??
Sources say he had creative differences with publishers. Checks made out to him for his work went uncashed. Tramp literally dropped off the face of the earth and was presumed dead. It was the geek version of an Abe Vigoda joke, people think he's dead until he makes another appearance in TV or movies.
Now some of you are going to look at the pictures in the link and think; 'so what?' A few people will say; 'Hey, he did that?' or, 'I never knew.'
Tramp's art was narrow in focus to the nerd set, but his work graced book covers the world over. Think of the nerd subset but internationally. It is possible he didn't know how far his reach was, or how many people his art touched. It is also possible that he felt shy and awkward about his success.
In thinking about this for the last day or two, I've reached a conclusion: Fame does not equal universal popularity. But what separates the merely successful to the moderately famous?
Persistence.
Steven King puts in 8 to 12 hour days writing. Some of his books are better than others, but he keeps cranking them out. I admire him for that.
Phil Foglio and Howard Taylor have drawn webcomics for years and are considered rock stars of the nerd set. Their track record can be measured in decades.
Karma may be instant, but success is slowly built up layer upon layer.

Do what you want

An interesting thing came across my computer screen via the Huffington Post: A Duke University freshman admits to being a porn star. In reading the article it seems a fraternity brother found out her secret and preceded to tell all his Greek brothers. Well, duh...
Never mind how they found out. It's not my place to judge someone else's life. This girl was smart enough to get into Duke. I saw the number 60,000 per year being thrown about while researching this post. So this girl makes an adult movie and it pays for her education. Unusual, but not novel.
I've known quite a few girls who danced at clubs while attending college during the day. Anecdotal evidence suggests this is a strategy that can pay for itself.
The double standard society places on women is hypocritical at best. I could do a whole bit on the Madonna/Whore stereotype, but y'all would tune my words out because it points to an ugly side of life. We Americans watch a lot of porn. 12 billion dollars raked in the U.S. alone. World wide it's closer to 57 billion. 
I don't have to guess, but it went down like this: the frat boys were watching a porno movie, because that is what frat boys do a lot of besides drink cheap beer. One of them said; 'Hey, that looks like that chick from my class.'
Being curious, horny and immature, one of the frat boys asks the girl if she was ever in a porn movie. Being honest about the situation, she admits it, but asks him to keep it a secret.
Ha! Frat boys keeping a secret. Who are we fooling? He blabs it to his whole fraternity hours later. Why should we be surprised?
Think what you want, but she found a way to pay for her college. In her words, she'll be nearly debt free. Now I'm not advocating this. Generally if you want something bad enough, you'll find a way to make it happen.
I had a discussion with my teen daughters about this. My oldest read the article. Her response?
"It's not what I would do, but I understand why she did it."
She went on to say, "More power to her. If she got something out of it, good for her."
Ever the pragmatic one, my middle child observed, "She should've not said anything. She should of left herself an escape route."
Hmm... plausible deniability. Even if she isn't ashamed of what she did, (she isn't) there will still be repercussions. She might get kicked out of her dream school. The hate e-mail is already pouring in. The trolls have caught her scent and are sending the bile her way. Not unexpected, mind you. I think that's cowardly: Hiding behind a computer screen while sending out some disgusting diatribe. Ye without sin cast the first stone...

So you made a movie that has gone around the internet and you're asking for privacy? That girl has an irony deficiency. Her stage name is in the article. I'm not using any of her nom de plumes because it doesn't matter in the long run. Sweetie, your 15 minutes are up. Move along...

But what does that say about us?
The 'men' who watched it are as much to blame as anyone. I'm assuming there had to be a guy in the video. Shouldn't he be held under the same microscope as the girl? Therein lies the double standard. Guys who sleep around are considered players. Girls who sleep around are considered whores. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?

Deaf awareness month

With all the stuff going on around here, I'm not surprised that this tidbit almost got away from me. It seems March is deaf awareness month.
This has roots in the Deaf President Now movement that started in Gallaudet University back in 1988. Perhaps I should back track a bit.
Gallaudet University is the premiere school for the deaf in Washington DC. In 1988 the board of trustees selected a hearing president to lead Gallaudet. This didn't sit to well with the students and alumni of the school. One of the things being deaf teaches you is self reliance. Having a hearing president was akin to letting the hearing people decide what was best for you. As if deaf people couldn't make their own decisions. This morphed into a movement referred to in deaf culture as DPN, or deaf president now. By the time March 13,1988 rolled around, several members of the board of trustees had resigned or stepped down due to the immense pressure put on them by the students, faculty and alumni, as well as the media attention Gallaudet was receiving. A deaf president by the name of King I. Jordan was selected. The other demands from the students were eventually met, including 51% of the board of trustees must also be deaf.
In turn, this inspired an entire deaf civil rights movement which is still going on to this day.
From what I've read in many books including Train Go Sorry by Leah Hager Cohen, deaf people have led a difficult life. Even to the point of having their language and reproductive rights taken away.

I count my blessings.

If anyone says I'm a bad father just because I'm deaf, they better be out of my arm reach. For that matter, I'm not a big fan of the words 'disabled' or 'handicapped' either.
I am proud more than I can say that one of my daughters wants a career in deaf advocacy.
To this day, deaf people are relegated to the back of the social bus, but adversity like this brings out the best in deaf culture. More and more I'm seeing articles about deaf owned startups and deaf entrepreneurs. Deaf people are creators and I count myself among them. 

A lot tougher

This post might take a bit of time because I want to do this right. When I find a topic I want to talk about, I do a little research, read a few articles and give my take on them. Pictures and links are a plus. Here is my hour research rule: If I can't find it after an hour of using Google or any other search engine, then other people would have a tougher time or not at all.
I'd recently finished reading an article about climate change. It's happening. Here's the whole article.
One paragraph that was noteworthy was this one:

1.  Climate scientists agree: climate change is happening here and now. Based on well-established evidence, about 97% of climate scientists have concluded that human-caused climate change is happening. This agreement is documented not just by a single study, but by a converging stream of evidence over the past two decades from surveys of scientists, content analyses of peer-reviewed studies, and public statements issued by virtually every membership organization of experts in this field. Average global temperature has increased by about 1.4˚ F over the last 100 years. Sea level is rising, and some types of extreme events – such as heat waves and heavy precipitation events – are happening more frequently. Recent scientific findings indicate that climate change is likely responsible for the increase in the intensity of many of these events in recent years.

Good enough for me, I was planning on my next car being a hybrid or electric car anyway. I've written about this in the past, but there's more to it. I'm seeing more solar and wind farms on the landscape and because of that I'm cautiously optimistic. What's the downside here? having a cleaner environment? Fewer gas guzzlers? Really, what do we have to lose?

Despite all that, I think things are getting better. Why? Because of this. Hey, wow and fantastic! There is evidence the ozone hole is getting smaller. It's my personal belief that we're not that far gone and by being a little more conscientious about our role on the planet, we can undo the damage we've caused. That isn't reason to slack off. If anything, I think we should put more effort into recycling and alternate energies rather than coal and oil. I'm going to make a prediction: we are going to run out of fossil fuels in our lifetimes. 

Yup, that happened

That didn't take long. Fred Phelps Sr. has past away. There are several things being said about him, none of them kind. I hope he finds the answers to his problems.
Bodies wear out. Organs fail. Our physical forms are hardy and fragile at the same time. That said, I believe the consciousness, the spirit, doesn't die along with the shell of meat. It becomes something else.
For a short time, I was between two realities. In one world was in agony and there were obstacles in my way in communicating with the loved ones who were nearby.
The other world was tranquil, peaceful. It was comfortable and I could go anywhere, do whatever I wanted to do. For a while I was visiting other places and eras. Even though I was with other people, I wasn't with anyone I recognized as family. Eventually I choose to stay in the place where friends and family were, despite the pain and trouble communicating. Eventually, the things that hurt became less so. I found new ways to connect with my loved ones.
That is my wish for a man who caused anguish and suffering of others. To learn, embrace diversity in all it's forms, and most of all, to grow as a person.
Looking back through the years I can see times where I was different. Literally I'm not the same person I was ten or twenty years ago... and I'm all right with that.
Every now and then I'll bump into someone I knew from years ago. When talking to them, the same phrase comes up again and again: I'm not the person I was from long ago. That's something I view as a good thing. 
Think about your own life. Are you doing the same thing you were five or ten years ago? Twenty? It may be a job or hobby, or even washing the dishes. Do you perform the same action you did back then?
Change is who we are. See it in others and see it in yourself. You'll be a better person because of it, I promise.

random quotes

I rest my case

A higher understanding

When I read this article Sunday night, two thoughts occurred to me.
One: Karma is a bitch.
Two: I have no sympathy for this hateful man.
Fred Phelps took his bigotry, wrapped it in religious justification and fed his hate. His actions destroyed his family. Sons and daughters excommunicated from the 'church' he founded. 
Perhaps I was brought up differently. To me, love will always triumph over hate. Anger, even righteous anger, takes a lot of energy. Even more, it takes a bit of your soul.

There is a tale I heard a long time ago and since learning of Fred Phelps' ill health, I thought it appropriate.
Inside each of our hearts is two wolves. One is patient, honorable and loyal. The other is cunning, deceitful and treacherous. The two wolves are constantly fighting... battling for control.
So which wolf wins? The one you feed.

I've heard the rumors that a bunch of groups want to picket his funeral and disrupt things the way Westboro Baptist Church did for a lot of people. There's one or two things wrong with that.
For starters, Mr. Phelps will be dead. He won't care. You won't be paying him back for all the crap he's pulled. Instead, the anger and hurt will be perpetuated, and no one needs that.
Be big enough to rise above the petty prejudice and hate.
These Westburo Baptist people have already shown their ignorance and repulsive behavior. They are the laughing stock of the entire world. Perhaps Mr. Phelps realized that and had a change of heart. We don't know for sure, no one is talking. The only thing I do have is that Fred Phelps sr. was excommunicated from his own church. 
Ah, irony. The wolves eat their own.